Some people struggle to feel their feelings, move through them, and move forward. When we experience something we perceive as “bad” or uncomfortable, our instinct is often to push it away—seeking distractions or trying to shut it down as quickly as possible. While this can provide temporary relief, over time it can lead to impulsive behaviors or patterns of coping that don’t serve us well. These behavior patterns may have developed through experiencing invalidation . This simply means that your emotions were not understood or accepted by those around you, or that there was a mismatch between your emotional experiences and how others related and responded to you. You might have heard things like: “You’re fine, it’s not that big of a deal.” “Stop being so sensitive.” “There’s nothing to be upset about.” It is important to remember that our loved ones, friends, and mentors that may have made these comments were often doing the best they could with the tools that they had. It is also true that these kinds of responses, over time, can make it hard to trust your own feelings. You might start to question whether your emotions are valid or worth sharing. In some cases, you might learn to push emotions down (emotional suppression), while in others, feelings might build up until they explode (emotional escalation). In a DBT approach to individual therapy, we focus on developing practical skills so that we can both express our emotions and a healthy way and contain them if they are feeling too intense to bear. Four key areas of growth are mindfulness (staying present and aware), emotion regulation (understanding and managing strong emotions), distress tolerance (coping with crises without making things worse), and interpersonal effectiveness (communicating needs and maintaining healthy relationships). Over time, you will start to rebuild trust in your own emotional experience . In a validating therapeutic environment, you’ll begin to see that your emotions make sense—even when they’re intense or painful. Together, we’ll work on recognizing your feelings, understanding what they’re telling you, and responding in ways that support your wellbeing. My approach to therapy is not about getting rid of emotions—it’s about learning how to live with them in a balanced way. You’ll learn how to calm your mind, express your needs, and handle challenges without losing yourself in the process. You’ll find a space where your emotions are respected, your struggles are understood, and your growth is supported every step of the way.
What first drew me to Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) was in the name itself: “Dialectical.” The term means that two opposing truths can coexist, and that there is always more than one way to view a situation (Linehan,DBT® Skills Training Manual, 2014). So often, self-growth can feel like a tug-of-war—we either push ourselves too hard to change or shut down completely when it feels like too much. A DBT approach to therapy offers a balanced alternative. Growth may mean both striving to improve; and accepting where we are while still moving toward where we want to be. At its heart, DBT is about finding that balance between acceptance and change—honoring our experiences while building the skills to create a more fulfilling life.